Saturday, April 30, 2011

Let's Define "The Blessing"

Picture this: It is your 80th birthday.  Your family has gathered to celebrate you.  Your children are about to speak.

What do you want them to say?

Take a moment and think about it.  Have the faith to write it out. 

Practice “The Blessing” when they are young and they will honor you when you are old. 

And so long as you are alive, no matter how old your children are you can practice “The Blessing.”  It is never too late.

The Blessing is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance.  But how is this lived out?  According to Trent & Smalley:

A family blessing begins with meaningful touching. It continues with a spoken message of high value, a message that pictures a special future for the individual being blessed, and one that is based on an active commitment to see the blessing come to pass.”

From the definition above you can see that the five elements of the blessing are:
  1. Meaningful Touching
  2. A Spoken Message
  3. A Message that Attaches High Value to the Child
  4. A Message that Helps to Picture a Special Future
  5. Active Commitment
I will be sharing what each part of the blessing means and how to practice it in upcoming posts.

Passing the Blessing is the privilege and duty of the Christian father.  The Blessing is a lifestyle.

So what does the Blessing look like?

There is a story by Chuck Swindoll that captures the heart of “The Blessing.”  

“During my days in seminary there was a young man there with a very large birthmark across his face.  It was crimson, or perhaps a bright, ruby red, that stretched from the eyelid on one side across part of the lips and mouth, down across the neck and into the chest area below the neck.  We were fairly close friend.  I asked him on one occasion how in the world he overcame that mark.  I mean, he used to make his living in front of the public with that birthmark.

“His response was unforgettable.  He said, ‘Oh, it was my dad.  You see my dad told me from my earliest days, ‘Son, that’s where an angel kissed you, and he marked you out just for me.  You are very special, and whenever we are in a group, I’ll know which one you are.  You’re mine.’  He said, ‘It got to where I felt sorry for people that didn’t have red marks across the front of their face.’”

Wow!  What a father!  What a blessing!

To all the Dads: Learn the Blessing and then be a blessing!

What are your thoughts?  What are your questions?

Please share your thoughts and questions below.

Your brother,

Minister Onorio


  1. I want to respond to the Birthmark. If I were the Father and that were my son, I would have been considering many scenarios of what it would be like for my son as he goes out into to the world. What would be the right thing to say to him? But being a Father who is a Christian or a Christian who is a Father, would make it easier, at least for me. I may not have come up with the same answer as the birthmark dad, but I am willing to bet dollars against donuts that whatever I told my son would be what he would need to face the world with conference. The reason I say this is; The Word, God's love letter to us makes us sensitive to the point of seeing beyond today. Helps us to Prepare our children for the future and at the same time understanding that today only last but a second. While today last but a second, what we say to our children will have an impact on their character that will last a life time, like it did for the birthmark son. God's word makes it so much easier to be learn the Blessing and be and live the blessing. The five elements of the Blessing are a blessing in themselves. Thank you my brother for this post.

  2. Thank you my brother for sharing.
    The story illustrates all of the elements of the blessing (except that "meaningful touching is not expressive other than the reference to an angel's kiss").
    But what's really the impact is the active commitment of the father. That supports and legitimizes everything else.


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