A Chosen Lifestyle, Part IV

A Man’s Relationships

Maintaining quality relationships doesn’t come easy for many men.  There are lots of reasons for this that I can’t explore in a blog.

But our Father calls us to be good stewards of our relationships.  The Holy Spirit will even send us back into existing relationships to renew them or to broken relationships to restore them.

One of the first things the Spirit of God told me to do after converting was to ask my father for his forgiveness.  My dad didn’t change but I did and our relationship was transformed.  Our Lord is concerned with us trusting him and being his vessels not simply getting our way.

I give this example because too many men say “Christ is the center of my life” but it’s not evident in our relationships.  For some Christian men their most important “relationship” is with their work.

That’s backwards.  The goal of the Christian life is to love God and to love others.  If we aren’t practicing love – or charity – which means giving for the sake and needs of others at the expense of self – then we are failing in life.

How should we develop and manage our relationships?

Here are two suggestions:

First, let’s define our roles.  Categorize the roles in your life (husband, father, church member, etc.) and then define the key people associated in each role.   Then prayerfully decide how you can intentionally fulfill your role from God’s point of view.

Finally, secure three key levels of relationships with other men.  The first level is having brothers that you can pray with, hangout with and simply talk to on a regular basis.  The second level is to pray for male mentors/role models in your life.  And the last level is to make yourself available to be a mentor.

This doesn’t have to be mentoring only other Christian men but a boy or young man in need of a consistent positive role model in his life.

Relationships need to be prioritized.  But work should never come before relationships.  And we can’t say we love God with all our hearts and yet fail to be good stewards over our relationships.

• So tell me, how do you prioritize your relationships?
• How do you cultivate and manage your relationships?
• In your opinion, do you think most of the men you know have shallow relationships?  If so then why?  
• And tell me about a time when God’s grace came to you through a relationship(s)?

Please post your thoughts below.

Your brother,

Minister Onorio